The topic came to me while I was reading

I was reading a few articles from a website that I enjoy. That website is Spirit Daily. Check it out here. The article that made me decide what to write about today was about the visions and the death of Sister Lucia de Jesus dos Santos. She recently passed away at the age of 97, the last survivor among the three people who had visions of Mary at Fatima, along with her cousins, Francisco and Jacinta Marto.

What I write about, though, is a personal experience of my own. I remember when I was an elementary school student at Saint Raphael School in the second grade. I don’t remember what the assignment was, in particular, but I do remember what I wrote about, my mother’s work with a few other people, organizing people to make a sort of pilgrimage to Necedah, Wisconsin to a site where a woman named Mary Ann (Hirt) Hoof was purported to have had visions of Mary appearing to her, claimed to have stigmata and was told future events. I hadn’t yet gone to see the site in Wisconsin, though some members of my family had.

Being a youngster at the time, of course, I didn’t understand that the Catholic Church doesn’t recognize that location as having been the site of a valid apparition. When I wrote about it, my essay was posted on the bulletin board along with every other second grader’s work. When I brought that assignment home, mom told me that I wasn’t supposed to tell anyone, because of the implications for some of the believers who had gone with mom to the site. There weren’t one or two local people who went, but dozens. One person who I mentioned in particular, I wasn’t supposed to reveal. She has since passed on, so there isn’t any risk of her being ostracized, and I can now say that she was Sister Marina, one of my favorite nuns at the school. She was an elderly woman but so full of life. I recall how entertained I was each time I spoke with her. Thinking back, I wonder if she wasn’t younger than I remember. Being seven years old, almost everyone seems elderly to you.

As I said, I wrote this assigned composition before I went to Necedah. I don’t remember how old I was when I actually went to the site, but my visit was within a year or two after the essay. I suppose I was 8 or 9 at the time. Mom worked with some others, though I don’t remember their names, and they arranged motor coaches that would take many people at a time to the site of the visions. The coach we traveled on was full to capacity. I had to stay in my seat. I remember that, because I was a kid, and I wanted to roam around the bus.

We went to the site in the spring. I remember that the grounds were muddy so I am assuming this was early spring, before planting time for the farmers. There was a house standing there, where the woman who witnessed the apparitions lived. Nearby was a circle of stones around a tree, the tree above which Mary is said to have appeared. After we toured the site, Mom bought a rosary with a silver chain for me. When the afternoon arrived, we all knelt down at the appointed time to recite the rosary. I remember this part clearly. Being a kid, it was difficult for my to be still for so long. I truly wanted to be part of this whole experience, so I tried very hard to focus on the prayers with my new rosary. I recall stories of how people went there to pray and purportedly, their rosaries would occasionally turn to a gold color (not actual gold as far as I know). We prayed the rosary and when we were done, I put the rosary in my pocket and ultimately, we got on the coach to return to Minnesota.

During the trip home, mom stood at the front of the coach to talk to everyone and to lead everyone in a prayer. She said that every so often a rosary would turn gold during the visit. Well, I took out my own rosary and, guess what? It didn’t have a silver chain any longer. The chain was gold.

You would suppose that I would be one of the most saintly, faithful people after that incident. I count myself among the faithful but I have struggled with living the way that Jesus lived and still wants us to live. As I get older, I have become more conscientious and mature, thank God for that. I have thought about that experience, looking for an explanation. The color of the rosary chain changed that day, and it wasn’t simple tarnishing of the chain. I say that with conviction because I got the rosary during the noon hour, and by 3 p.m., it had changed to a gold color. Can tarnishing happen that quickly? Everyone knows that inexpensive jewelry can turn your skin green, right? I suppose everyone has seen that at some point in time or heard of somebody who had that happen. In the course of three hours, the chain turned from a silver color to gold, not various shades or irregularly as tarnishing would. It was a solid color of gold. This is something that I cannot explain to this day, other than what I have just stated, which is God’s honest truth.

In researching the stories that this woman has told, I don’t know what to believe. Many say that she was a devout Christian who sought God in prayer. Others say that Mary Ann Hoof was a fraud and led a life that would make a sailor blush, that she came up with peculiar stories. Apparently, some of those who believed her elevated her to cult-like status. I was too young to base anything solidly upon my own insights at that time.

I do not know what I should read into what happened from my viewpoint, other than to say two things. One, my rosary did actually change. It can be argued, I suppose, that maybe it was Satan’s influence to bring another soul to venerate a false representation of God’s image. Alternatively, it could be something to demonstrate the splendor and supremacy of God. I choose to believe in the infinite power of God, gently nudging me in the right direction.

Secondly, Mary, the mother of God, when she has appeared, as acknowledged by the Church, has had few requests, other than to say, fundamentally, “People, you need to pray, live righteously and believe in God.” Some people elevate Mary to a place so near God that it is dangerously simple to worship Mary, from our flawed human view. Losing a perspective on what I will call the hierarchy of Heaven is fraught with peril. Mary was Jesus’ Earthly mother, and the Bible states clearly she was chosen to be “the hand-maiden of the Lord.” As such, she was born without sin and raised Jesus knowing it wouldn’t be a bed of roses, but a crown of thorns, literally and figuratively. She knew that he would suffer and die to save those who accept him and believe. Of course, she was grief-stricken, as any mother would be, and yet, she fulfilled her obligation to the Father.

I feel that praying to God through Mary is fine, as long as we bear in mind that Mary is not a god, but one of the deservedly honored people through which God is working his great eternal plan. God unquestionably knows our intentions, no matter how we might try to conceal our human failings.

Regarding the whole Necedah experience from my perspective, this is my conclusion: Discernment of reports of miraculous occurrences needs to be carefully and prayerfully done. Anyone willing to place their beliefs and actions solely at the mercy of a particular "visionary" is courting disaster. Before making a decision as far-reaching as this, any sensible person will examine and evaluate all the evidence for the claims being made, find out what the local medical and religious authorities believe is occurring and then prayerfully consider the possibilities.

When impostors misrepresent His message for their acclaim and attention and are exposed as being self-interested hypocrites, it denigrates the messenger while it muddies the message. The Catholic Church has condemned this woman’s message and her claims. About one third to one half of the research I have read seems to indicate that she was a phony who was seeking attention and recognition. A group formed around her, most likely not at her behest, to collect donations from those who believed or wanted to believe. Sadly, it seems possible that she was out of her mind or purposefully acting in her own interest. Her early “vision days” drew tens of thousands of people, the curious and the earnest crowds that wanted to believe. Years later, Van Hoof said she still talked regularly with the Virgin Mary, but few listened. And fewer believed. It seems she probably was telling the truth, at least in the beginning. I wonder, though, if she deviated from that truth, when her claims grew to be fantastic in detail. Assuming that is a true statement, whether she intentionally misled or was just a sick woman, it is very regrettable and it detracts from God and his message.

Maybe you disagree with me on some parts of this. Maybe you think I am a raving lunatic. So be it. I feel the power of God in my heart, and I try to live my life for his glory and not my own. I have accepted Him into my life as my personal savior. I have a long way to go to be even a little bit like Him. No matter… God loved me enough to sacrifice his own son, paying a penalty in Jesus’ blood that I can scarcely comprehend. I know one thing. My God is an awesome God.